The Kid’s Sports Oscars: Best Actor Who You Forgot Was In The Movie

We’re live here at the Kid’s Sports Oscars after a tremendous trip down the red carpet with the washed-up child actors of the 1990s. Follow us here for up-to-the-minute analysis on the winners as the award show will likely last throughout the week. Who will take home the prestigious Ball Trophy? Only time will tell.

After a crazy first round of Video Awards (You can check out the winners here), we will move on to the more serious awards. The eighth category to be announced, and second of the Part One categories, will be for Best Actor Who You Forgot Was In The Movie. But before we announce the winner, let’s first take a moment to break down the nominees.

Best Actor Who You Forgot Was In The Movie
1. Adrien Brody, “Angels in the Outfield”
2. Tony Danza, “Angels in the Outfield”
3. Danny DeVito, “Space Jam”
4. Denis Leary, “The Sandlot”
5. Matthew McConaughey, “Angels in the Outfield”

The youngest actor to win the Best Actor Oscar, Adrien Brody from “Angels in the Outfield” solidified his legacy for his tremendous performance in “The Pianist” in 2003. Since then, he’s appeared in lower-profile pictures, most recently as the scene-stealing Salvador Dali in Woody Allen’s charming ”Midnight in Paris.” Therefore, it can be  logically assumed that Brody’s role as the bumbling journeyman Danny Hemmerling in “Angels” was the catalyst for his career. All the awards, the national recognition and the fame stemmed from his angel-induced inside-the-park home run that befuddled the opposing team and captivated the audience’s hearts.

Unlike Brody, Tony Danza’s role in “Angels in the Outfield” came 14 years after his film debut, and his experienced showed in a tear-jerking veteran performance as the aging pitcher Mel Clark. We are informed that Clark is on his last legs, both as a player and a human being. It’s an incredibly morbid moment for a Disney movie that nonetheless tugs at our proverbial heartstrings and connects us with heaven. Mel Clark’s going to die from smoking too much but, if that’s the logic, then maybe Tony Danza should have died from absolutely smoking this role.

Michael Jordan may have won the game, but Danny DeVito’s portrayal of Mr. Swackhammer in “Space Jam” definitely won the movie, whatever that means. The ruthless Monstars boss even looks like the legendary DeVito, right down to the gruff tone, pudgy face and cartoonish demeanor. Difficult as it may be to win the award when you don’t actually appear on screen, DeVito lent his voice to the part and made it a slam dunk. The film was sandwiched for DeVito between two Satellite Award nominations for Best Supporting actor in “Matilda” and “The Rainmaker.” Truly, DeVito was the rainmaker in “Space Jam” as well.

His role limited to pegging the young Smalls in the face and then slapping meat on his eye — no, not a euphemism — nonetheless Denis Leary shines as Bill in “The Sandlot.” Just his third film role and first since 1991, the brief appearance actually set the stage for the film’s chaotic plot. Without Bill’s prized, Babe Ruth-autographed baseball, Smalls would have nothing to steal and consequently nothing to eject over the fence into the belly of the beast. Likewise, they never would have met a blind James Earl Jones (a narrow miss for this award’s nomination), traded the Ruth ball for one signed by the ’27 Yankees and Benny “The Jet” Rodriguez would have never made the Major Leagues. So basically, he has Denis Leary to thank for that one. Thanks, Denis Leary, we love you.

A fairly average actor who’s fame far outweighs his actual on-screen abilities and unspellable last name, Matthew McConaughey’s role as outfielder Ben Williams in “Angels in the Outfield” was the third of his career, which makes him the third actor on this list for whom their respective movie was one of their first five, further proving the greatness of kids sports movies — they give C-list actors with B-list accents and A-list sexiness their start. Thing is, McConaughey is good as Williams, just another one of the foolhardy Angels who must rely on actual Angels to get them victories. “Williams didn’t appear much in the movie, but he was shown, he is recognizable as McConaughey– even with a hat on,” writes one random blogger. Recognizable as the sexy, stoic man who dominates today’s romantic comedy scene, indeed.

And the winner is…

Adrien Brody from “Angels in the Outfield”

Obviously. He won an Oscar. This one wasn’t even close.